Busyness can be a huge distraction not to mention a massive drain on our lives and never more so than in midlife. Some of us have such a strong sense of obligation to our partners, children, parents, friends and colleagues which have build up over the years and decades that we end up being absent from our own lives because of our comittments to everyone else. It may feel harsh to read but ask yourself, is that the truth for you ?
In the past we may have felt like we were running on our own personal hamster wheel barely managing to cling on but now us little hamsters get to choose whether we want to stay on the wheel or get off.
Some of us may begin to feel that our usual level of busyness is growing due to things outside our control. But here’s the thing, actually it is mostly within our control if only we said “No” sometimes. Learning to say “No” is a whole topic in its self but as I am focussing on busyness today, here are my top points to help you take your foot off the accelerator pedal and gain back a bit of control and joy into your life.
Say goodbye to perfection
Lightening up on the “Perfection Scale” can help us to feeling happier with our lot but it is oh so hard to do if you are a busy perfectionist, I am still a work in progress on this point ! There is so much pressure on women to “do it all” but actually the biggest voice that fuels this thought process is the voice in our own heads. Trying to kick that idea of being perfect all the time by letting the odd thing slip can take the pressure off us and feel so liberating too. Only focus on achieving what is actually important in that moment and any more than that is a bonus. And, remember to take a minute out of your day to think of all the great things that you have achieved, I’ll bet it is alot more than you give yourself credit for.
You are your priority
Make yourself your priority first thing in the morning. If you don’t set yourself up well for the day how can you expect to achieve everything you feel you have to get done. You are gorgeous and that takes a little bit of time, love and care so put in place a great morning and evening routine that suits you and that you stick too no matter what. If you feel well in yourself you will most likely do a better job of getting through the tasks ahead.
Remember the basics
I find I get super cranky when I don’t eat regularly so don’t skip meals or drinking your water.
Write it down
When you feel overwhelmed, try writing things down. A list helps you to prioritise your thoughts and decide what things really are urgent. When you are overly busy it is easy to forget things – there is only so much juggling one gal can take, writing stuff down will reduce some of the pressure you may be feeling.
Put structure in
Putting structure into your day by figuring out when is your most productive time of the day and make a plan to do the hardest chores/jobs then. I find it easier to get the jobs I hate done early in the day or I just spend the whole day fretting about that job that I have to do later on. We can waste so much mental energy working this way. Having a mini exercise break to stretch, do a few squats or even Jumping around on a mini trampoline between the jobs on your to do list can help to relieve tension or give your stiff body a break if you have been hunched over a computer for too long. And, no matter how busy you are, giving yourself a “carrot”, for example “when I finish XYZ, I am going out for a lovely walk or I’m going to meet someone for a drink”…. a little enticement never hurt anyone.
At the end of the day you can’t be everything to everyone and your best is always good enough. Never forget that being kind to ourselves is always respected by others as that is how they know that you treat them too.
Do share with us on Instagram @webofgoodness how you have been reducing your busyness. All the wins whether great or small are welcome.